Listening to the Unchurched & Dechurched

One of the central aspects of our congregation's Mission, Vision, and Plan for the Future is to try and be more intentional (and curious!) about questions related to evangelism, welcome, and incorporation. 

In April we undertook a survey of our members, divided into groups by how long they'd been a part of our parish life. We learned a lot of interesting points about who our church is, what parts of our shared life people most value, how people felt welcomed and how we could welcome better. We also learned how the answers to those questions shifted somewhat, depending on how long someone has been in our congregation. My own analysis of that data, along with the raw data itself, is online here.

As the Vestry discussed the data from that survey, we kept coming back to one reality: the importance of being attentive to the sample reality. The survey was a sample of those who not only visited SJE, but who chose to come back and be committed. We started wondering about those people who live in our area but are not currently connected to a faith community. What would be important to them? What are they hungering for (if anything!) in their own spiritual life.

With these questions in mind, the Vestry asked me to design a new survey that would be targeted out on social media to the unchurched in our geographic area. I used the trend-lines and ideas from a survey the Pew Research Center did in 2018 (see the CNN article online here) as my own baseline, but then edited it to get as well at some of the questions our Vestry had. 

After designing the survey using Google Forms, I boosted it on Facebook among people who are not currently connected to a faith community and who live within 20 or so miles of our parish. As the first line in the boosted ad, I also wrote, "Do you not have a faith community? If you'll fill out this short survey, you'll be entered in a drawing to receive $50 in Dune Dollars!" (Dune Dollars is our local gift certificate system supported by the Chamber of Commerce.

The ad ran for about two weeks. It reached over 7,000 people. Of those, over 200 clicked the link to find out more. And of those 200, 64 individuals took the time to fill out the survey.

That may not seem like a lot, given the reach (unless you understand the difference between ad reach and action with Facebook advertising), but what I want to emphasize is that we had over sixty people who do not go to church and live in our area respond and tell us what would be important in a faith community, from the perspective of someone not currently involved in one. 

The demographic breakdown of the ad from an age perspective was also particularly interesting, with 92% of respondents being under the age of 50 and 70% being under the age of 40. 

We offered a total of fourteen possible items that could be important to someone when choosing a faith community. Of those fourteen, the following were the top five:

1. Authentic Community (78%)
2. Progressive Advocacy (66%)
3. A chance to make a difference in the world (54%)
4. Preaching that connects with my life (53%)
5. To become a better person (53%)

The three lowest items that people found important were Contemporary Worship (24%), Conservative Advocacy (12%), and Traditional Worship (5%). 

What this says to me is largely what I've read in other studies on these questions over the years. For people outside the church, the worship wars are largely over. The style of worship will not, for most unchurched people, be what draws them to your congregation. However you worship, whether traditional or contemporary, low or high, do it well with integrity for your tradition and authenticity for your best gifting. Worship style isn't going to move the needle. What people want is a sense of authenticity, advocacy and action when it comes to issues progressives care about, and a message that will connect with their own life and help them to be who God is calling them to be.

This is good news to me, as an Episcopalian and as the priest at St. John's Episcopal Church here in Grand Haven. Because these are things we can do. We can be authentic advocates for change who connect people with a spiritual life that grounds them and empowers them to grow into all the fullness God has for them. 

We also asked those who responded what keeps them away from church. Once more, almost no one spoke about the style of worship. Instead, many of the respondents talked about the hate they hear in supposedly Christian voices, particularly to LGBTQ, BIPOC, and other marginalized individuals. Several also spoke to an experience of a toxic religious environment or traumatic religious upbringing, people who had been deeply wounded by churches and who had trouble believing they could ever find anything healthy and life-giving. 

This underscores the essentiality in being a full-throated advocate for issues of diversity, equity, and inclusion. No matter how articulate you are in the pulpit, or in your church newsletter, people who are outside of the church aren't hearing those messages. So it is incumbent upon Episcopal Churches to be explicit about the ways we celebrate all the ways LGBTQIA+ people contribute to our common life and to be very intentional about the work of dismantling racism and engaging in works of reconciliation. 

It also speaks to the essentiality of a spirit and tone of gentleness when you engage someone who is not in a faith community. The odds of them having had a traumatic or abusive religious experience in their past is pretty high—and it skyrockets if they are a woman, a person of color, or from the LGBTQIA+ community. Gentle and authentic affection, a willingness to walk alongside of them—not to try to convince them just to join your church—these are so very important if we are going to bring any healing to those who have had spiritual wounds inflicted upon them. 

Many people also said they find themselves too busy. They would be open to being a part of a church, but carving out that time is difficult—particularly when they fear they will be pressured to get more involved, to volunteer in several activities, to let the church sort of suck them up. This underscores the importance for me in having a church that is invitational in posture and attitude. That is, people are invited to get as involved as they feel called... but they are also told clearly that we are here to be a faith community for them no matter what. If that means they just show up to feed the hungry once every few months, or just come on Christmas and Easter, or if they kind of pop in and out from time to time, our job is to be a welcoming place where people feel invited—not compelled—to explore the rich life of faith in community.

We also asked people what they would say to a church that wanted to be a more meaningful place for people like them to attend. Over and over again, we saw two key points. First, be open to those who doubt and are unsure of their faith or belief in God. Let people know they will not be judged for their struggles. Give them room to explore and question. Second, be a community that truly accepts all people, where people from marginalized groups are not just tolerated but are celebrated. 

We also heard the essentiality of concrete action. Words mean little when they do not have positive action behind them. So, if you care about racial reconciliation, demonstrate that by the actions you take, your hiring decisions, the programs you offer. 

And don't be afraid to say, "We're not that." That is, clearly and boldly separate yourself from the nationalistic, homophobic, heterosexist, ethnocentric, and capitalistic forms of Christianity that have come to dominate the national perception. Be clear that that is not the God you believe in and that you believe following Jesus means not only rejecting that false version of Christianity but being an advocate for those who have been damaged by it. 

Most people who filled out the survey, 55%, said they didn't want to be contacted after filling out their responses. It is important to honor that, and so that is what we did. However, for the other 41% who said they would be open (and the 4% who said please do contact me), I took about two days to read through every individual response. I then wrote an email to each individual, expressing gratitude for them sharing their perspective and engaging with what they specifically wrote. I also offered to get together so I could learn more of their story, as well as answer any questions they might have about the Episcopal Church.

I don't know how many people will respond to that invitation. I'm having coffee on Wednesday with one person who responded, though. She even came to church this past Sunday to check us out. But even if very few people respond, I hope we've been able to plant some seeds, to model an approach to Christianity that is more about listening with curiosity and affection and less about telling people how wrong they are. 

And I'm grateful. I'm grateful for the way all of this information will help our Vestry engage carefully and strategically with efforts of evangelism and welcome. Because what's clear to me is that many of the people who responded would love to hear some good news, and that's really what evangelism is. It's sharing the good news with people. It's our job now to go out and tell them that there is a place like us, a place where they would be welcome, honored, invited to go deeper spiritually and engage in bold advocacy and action. That sounds like good news to me—and I hope it will to them as well.

To see the full report on the data gleaned in the survey, you can click here.